The early bird catches the worm but the second mouse gets the cheese!

Monday, July 21, 2008

Not quite as tasty as the turkey sausage links

Blech, woke up again with the challenge of picking hair out of my mouth. Since I'm not like Ben Franklin's clone right before he became a headless horseman, I don't really have any desire to eat hair. That has to be one of the top trivial annoyances of long hair lol. A few others are wind, getting poked in the eyes, and I used to burn the tips quite often a few years back when it was a lot longer with my ciggys.

Had a boring weekend, bought a bunch of dvd's and a package of tools for at my house. I am going to dedicate a short blog to those tools soon (more precisely a rant, yes that's what I said, rant) because I use tools everyday at work (cnc machinist for those who didn't know how I earn a living.)

(Afterthoughts)
The whole Ben eating hair joke went over most everyone's heads but since I know at least one girl who will have gotten that joke I didn't quote where it is from. ;)

Sunday, July 20, 2008

Do what with my butt?

Got me a new chair today, yeah it's a cheap one but easy to move around or store away. And it is actually rather comfortable since there is no hard support under where you sit so it is nice.



(Afterthoughts)
Yes, I am soooo bored that I posted a picture of a $20 chair. 'sigh'

Saturday, July 19, 2008

Sorry but the music is only in your head

(la la la)
30 pounds of turkey sausage links in the freezer,
(la la la)
30 pounds of turkey sausage links,
(la la la)
Take one down,
(la la la)
Into your throat,
(la la la)
Shove it down,
(la la la)
Slightly less than 30 pounds of turkey sausage links in the freezer.
(la la la)

(Afterthoughts)
That song sure sucked but I actually did buy that, and for only $30. I would have got more than that since $10 a box is awesome but at least I got the last 3 lol.

Sarcastic quote of the day

"Yeah, I'm a girl, thanks for the newsflash!"

(Afterthoughts)
Ok, I'm a bitch, thanks for the newsflash lol.

Thursday, July 17, 2008

Noooooo!, I've been replaced with an alien clone

Last night after work I ended up at a place that should shock a lot of you. If I ever see mention of the place on anyone's posts I always rant about it lol. So yes, that's right, I went to the evil Nazi coffee overlord's domain, Starbucks. Now before anyone get's too excited thinking I have changed my views on the place, I have not, and they are cemented even more firmly into my psyche now. Now for the reason y'all are dying to know, why did I go there considering how much I dislike the place, their attitude, and mostly their overpriced coffee swill. One reason only, to hang out with one of my friends. She loves the place, probably due to their mind control methods which I have yet to figure out (in the coffee? music? subliminal advertising?) I'll even admit that I had a good time (not because of the coffee I gagged down) but because it was just nice to hang out with my friend and just sit there and chat. That was really nice and something I don't get anywhere near enough of lol. So don't anyone think I'm getting soft about the coffee house illuminate, cause I still don't like 'em or their stuff that is almost, but not quite, coffee.

(Afterthoughts)
We did sit outside, no way I would stay under their roof longer than necessary.

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

There's surely some point to this one

Blah blah, woke up this morning screaming, half rage and half terror from another nightmare. They haven't been happening as frequently as they used to (like every single freakin' night lol) and because of the loss of intimate familiarity they seem to punch just a shade harder now. Hooray. This one involved me dragging people into a safe house where they could hopefully hideout from a rampaging monster thing. Right before I woke up screaming I was heading for the door myself when a little furball of teeth and claws (aka a kitten) tore its way up my leg and back and threw itself against the door in abject terror. So I grabbed it (what the hell was I thinking, ouch, my poor skin) and tossed it inside the house. Of course I had to look behind me to see why it was so freaked out only to naturally find the monster thing lurking right behind me. Great, even my damn nightmares have turned cliche lol. So naturally this long tentacle with a large gaping mouth full of sharp teeth lunges straight at me (cliche cliche cliche) and I punched it, saving myself a nasty bite in exchange for some bloodied knuckles. As it backed away in shock I jumped straight at it landing a few good hits and kicks while it shrieked and flailed and bit at me. That was the point I finally woke up partly relieved after my screaming had stopped and partly still thirsting for blood (luckily I was sleeping alone lol.) Welcome to my world, please stay off the grass, it's difficult to regrow after monsters get their slime all over it. :)

(Afterthoughts)
As far as my dream, don't think I'm getting soft because I saved a kitten. In real life I would have tossed that little whirlwind of claws straight at the damn monster as soon as I could have ripped it out of its death hold on my skin. Best to open an attack on a monster with another one I always say lol.

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Um, yuk?

I picked up a bucket of KFC Sunday and have been munching on that these past couple of days. The thing that still gets me about it even after all these years is an old comic book that I read when I was in high school. The issue I'm reminded of was based on 'cholesterol vampires' who would suck that out of your blood (and turn you into one of them.) Their victims of preference were those who had a high fat diet, and the vampires wandered around like zombies moaning stuff like "mmmm, chicken skin pudding," hence my remembrance every time I eat KFC. The thought of that still cracks me up today lol.

(Afterthoughts)
Ok, although 'chicken skin pudding' is a funny concept with the vampires, the thought of eating it does turn my stomach, blech, sometimes even I wonder just what the hell I was thinking when I started typing lol.

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

DIY fireball

Warning, this is not the safest thing y'all can do so for legal reasons I DO NOT recommend trying it. However just to 'explain' how such a thing is done, you simply melt a candle in a small jar/bucket on a heat source such a grill. When the candle is melted into liquid you simply add some water (do it quickly, seriously quickly) and you will have an instant fireball. Of course the more candle you use the bigger the fireball so if you are going to try this use a birthday cake candle first just as a trial for your own safety. Have fun. ;)



(Afterthoughts)
I ended up being too scared to try it, lol.

Sunday, July 6, 2008

Email joke I got

INTERNATIONAL THINKING - AT ITS BEST!

QUESTION:What is the truest definition of Globalization?

ANSWER:Princess Diana's death.

QUESTION:How come?

ANSWER: An English Princess with an Egyptian boyfriend crashes in a French tunnel, driving a German car with a Dutch engine, driven by a Belgian who was drunk on Scottish whiskey, followed closely by Italian Paparazzi, on Japanese motorcycles; treated by an American doctor, using Brazilian medicines.

This is sent to you by an American, using Bill Gate's technology, and you're probably reading this on your computer, that uses Taiwanese chips, and a Korean monitor, assembled by Bangladeshi workers in a Singapore plant, transported by Indian lorry-drivers, hijacked by Indonesians, unloaded by Sicilian longshoremen, and trucked to you by a Mexican illegal.....

THAT my friends, is globalization!

(Afterthoughts)
I'm not touching this one.

4th events of holiday July style

To simply compress my holiday, I took my nephews (and sister) firework shopping, spent $200. I normally don't spend quite that much but it's hard not too when I have 2 little boys with me lol. I thought that I did the fireworks just for the 2 oldest boys but it turns out that I did a lot of it for the youngest one (1 1/2 yr. old). He sat in a high chair and smiled and laughed and clapped the whole time. Seeing him enjoy the fireworks and not get spooked by the explosions and just act sooo happy during the entire thing made every penny I spent worth it.

On the down side, not long after everything was over my stomach starting hurting, really really bad. The last week of vacation a while back I spent an entire week in pain, same deal, just not as long but just as bad. For those who missed out on that, I was leaning towards that assumption that my appendix may have burst a while back (that is how much pain my gut was in). But since I made a speedy recovery (took about a day) I can just block out how I was lying on the floor hating to even breathe since the tiniest movement racked my body in pain. Fun times, fun times. (Now go away memories of that lol.)

(Afterthoughts)
Um, ouch?

Thursday, July 3, 2008

Little Girl on a Plane

A stranger was seated next to a little girl on the airplane when the stranger turned to her and said,'Let's talk. I've heard that flights go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger.' The little girl, who had just opened her book, closed it slowly and said to the stranger, 'What would you like to talk about?' 'Oh, I don't know,' said the stranger. 'How about nuclear power?' and he smiles. OK, ' she said. 'That could be an interesting topic. But let me ask you a question first. A horse, a cow,and a deer all eat the same stuff - grass - . Yet a deer excretes little pellets, while a cow turns out a flat patty, and a horse produces clumps of dried grass. Why do you suppose that is?' The stranger, visibly surprised by the little girl's intelligence, thinks about it and says, 'Hmmm, I have no idea.' To which the little girl replies, 'Do you really feel qualified to discuss nuclear power when you don't know shit?

(Afterthoughts)
Bwahahaha, hell yeah!

Happy 4th of July eve everyone

I did my good deed of the day. My landlady and her boyfriend have a nice garden in my backyard and I've been taking photos of it every couple of days with my cell phone and emailing the pictures to myself for the past month. When they start picking all the food out of it I am going to make a slideshow dvd from the pictures. Since I went over and paid my rent today (about a week and a half early as I normally try to do) I burnt a quickly put together dvd using the pictures I have already taken. It wasn't very long but it was neat for them to see how much it has grown and gives them an idea of what the final dvd will look like, except I will add music and dates to the pictures.

I will be going to my mom's house tomorrow morning (I am supposed to go to a birthday party at the club tonight but considering my mood I doubt I will bother). My 2 oldest nephews are going to go firework shopping with me so I can set off a bunch of explosions. I may have to go ahead and drink some before I start the firework show because nothing goes better with alcohol than explosives (and firearms of course) lol.

(Afterthoughts)
Boom boom boom.

That time again, blah

Bad mood time, by which I mean, horrible @^&**# and %@!##* mood!!!! Holidays ALWAYS do this to me, I end up angry at everything and everyone, and I have almost no desire at all to even attempt to deal with anything. The worst part of it all is that it's an effect from my human half and my demoness side actually finds the root cause of this amusing (horrifying that people repeatedly cause this phenomenon, but still amusing.) I'm not even gonna bother to rant any more about the topic, it just sucks but should wear off early next week like usual once reality slides back to 'normal.'

(Afterthoughts)
Blech.