Halloween sadness

I am sitting home alone after working all night and missing Halloween altogether. Watching The Nightmare Before Christmas special edition that I have been holding off on watching but couldn't resist putting it in tonight. I love that movie, have seen it 100's of times and it always pulls at my heartstrings every single time. I just identify with the darkness/light combinations in the characters way too much. Five minutes into the movie and I'm crying at the 2nd song already which really is a very sad one and very similar to my own life.



(Afterthoughts)
There are not many things that hurt me this bad thru the reflection back of my own existence. I guess we all have our own little soft spots is all I care to say about it and don't have the desire at all to describe all the links to myself that I see in it.

My date of death is age 70

My teacher listed a website that will predict your life expectancy and after taking the test it calculated that my current lifestyle will end when I am 70 years old at which time I will move into a nice casket or urn depending on what is done with my cold, lifeless body (or perhaps end up in some medical lab if I get sold instead, those poor scientists lol.) The interesting thing is that after the test it tells you what your potential age that you could live to can be if you change some of your bad habits. Mine is 103 if I alter a few simple things. If you are brave you can take the test here, but if you are too scared, that's ok too. I'll just tell you the same thing I tell #4 all the time, "I could show up wearing a dress and everyone would still think I'm more of a man than you are!" Now go get on your little girl bike and pedal back home crying if you won't take the test.

(Afterthoughts)
Honestly 70 was a higher number than I thought I would get and most of the options for extending my life are stuff I have recently started implementing but didn't list them in my test answers. And making fun of those who don't want to take the test is definitely not nice but I have never claimed to be a nice girl, constantly rant about stuff, and continually remind y'all that I am half demoness, so why is anybody surprised by my comments? MUHAHAHA!!!

Freezer burnt

2 solid days of rage burning away my insides as I walked around with a 'smile' plastered to my face and chatted and joked around with everyone. No one realized just how badly my insides were being charred away which is exactly how things are supposed to be, my place is to suffer in silence (and bitch about it here lol.) Although the group of guys I hang out with on breaks did notice that I was kind of wound up more than usual, I always rant about silly nonsense stuff anyway and the intensity is generally enjoyed when I get worked up about something and keep everyone laughing. But anyway, the fires pretty much simmered down to embers about the time I hit last break at work with 2 more hours left before I could go home. By the time I walked into my house I had lost most of the feeling in my soul. So I sat on my couch outside on my front porch reflecting about everything and anything for a while. That turned out to eventually turn out to become an hour and a half in the cold air and only after I was shivering so badly that I was way past the point where I should have been able to stand it did I return inside the house. Other than quite possibly giving myself a cold (I'll know before the weekend is over) I neither resolved nor even made any progress towards resolving anything other than deciding to reflect in a warmer environment from now on (which isn't actually a bad lesson in and of itself although I should have already known that lol.) My brain feels like it has been dipped and coated in wax (why couldn't it at least have been chocolate?) and some type of 6th sense has been cut off leaving me feeling half blind and half deaf to the world and myself. All the colors and sounds are still there but seem washed out and faded. I know logically that I should care and be bothered by this but I can't really muster up very much rebellion against it. It feels calm and serene and drifting thru everything feeling only ghosts of emotions is frighteningly comforting. I seriously wonder if my internal debates should not be how to get out of this state but rather how do I maintain it.

(Afterthoughts)
I'll be sure to wave as I drift on by. And as I read over all I had written I am always amazed at how well I misdirect without even having to try by slipping silly jokes etc. into everything, that is sooo awesome-o!

Why I really am angry

Want to know the reason behind my anger? Here it is. I discovered that the creepy guy out in the parking lot actually did not have any candy in the back of his van.

(Afterthoughts)
:(

About time for another rant

I haven't had a good rant post in quite a while and we happened to run across this topic briefly on break at work last night. It had something to do with talking about how some sports dude was doing really good and spouted out that he was hotter than a bagel fresh from the toaster over. (I have no idea who the hell he was, I just babble nonsense stuff like that to keep the conversations going lol.) But then I was like, ya know, I actually hate freaking bagels, those things suck. And the 4 guys I was chatting with all chimed in that none of them really cared for them either. So of course, I had to say something more.

"You know why bagels suck? It's because they make them by mixing bubble gum with ground up cardboard and then baking it into a donut shape! Read the ingredients, it's right on the side of the bag."

That had all them all shaking their heads and laughing. The general consenus was that I should be writing a book about all my strange theories and ideas because I come up with bizarre new ones on a daily basis.

(Afterthoughts)
Ok, not much of a rant, but who cares. The important thing is that I really don't like bagels and my description of them is totally accurate on how I think the experience of trying to eat one really is. Yuk!

My new fossil discovery

Digging around in frozen depths I discovered these beauties hidden beyond the sight of casual by-passers. They are resting in a pan full of sludge in that pic but are simply amazing when viewed up close on a display plate. So what are they exactly? Ancient fossils from an era long past? Or something more recent from maybe the past couple of centuries? The truth is that they are t-bone steaks from one of my family's pet cows, baked in a potato cheese teriyaki garlic sauce. Ha ha. Looks like a train wreck but are damn tasty. I was hoping a friend of mine would be able to visit and stay for a couple of days but unfortunate circumstances prevented that from happening. So I was kind of sad and depressed about that so I decided to cook myself a nice meal to try to pick my spirits up a bit. Of course that meant that this meal did not come out of my oven until 3am and I finally managed to roll into bed at 5am this morning. Oh well, sleep sucks anyway, I never have truly enjoyed it (seriously, I hate sleeping, all joking aside.)

They show THAT to kids?

I found this in a childrens book and noticed something that has been apparently overlooked by all you mere mortals. Offically I find this highly amusing (unofficially, I am rather horrified.) If you look closely at the mouse, just what rude hand gesture is that little bastard doing to the rabbit? Most likely not what the artist intended but sometimes things don't work out like we planned.




(Afterthoughts)
This is one of the quicker blogs I have lined up from the weekend, there is still a much, much longer one coming soon to a computer screen near you.

Homemade laundry soap is what's for dinner

I got this link from a friend of mine and found it rather interesting. It is directions on how to make your own laundry soap for the cost of about $0.03/ load compared to an average of $0.30/ load if you use the store bought stuff. That doesn't really sound like much until you add it all up. It sounds like a lot of fun to make also, especially if you have kids (or act like a kid like me lol.) Check it out here, I can't wait to make some myself, muhahaha. Slimy, hooray!

(Afterthoughts)
Soap? SOAP!?! What the hell am I babbling about, argh, forget it, I wash my hands of this affair (har har.) I must have lost it if I'm now getting excited about laundry soap, 'sigh.'