Today I feel calm and half relaxed, which of course makes for poor postings by the mistress of misery and archduchess of anger (I have heard what y'all whisper about me when you think I'm not paying attention!) Some of it is due to me getting the metaphorical "rock of sensibility" smashed against my teeth right when I was ready to scrap yet another blog and just start ranting in a "pen & paper" journal instead (yep, I was just gonna up and leave with no warnings at all because I was actually that upset). Skipping the details of that conversation, she basically told me that the reason I get so upset and frustrated with humans is because I am only partially one and by trying to deny my demoness side and understand people on their level I was creating a lot of internal friction which is spilling out towards everyone. She told me I needed to realize that I needed to take several steps back and take a clearer and bigger scope viewpoint of everything so I could see that humanity is not what I really am totally a part of and to stop denying my demoness side because that just splits my entire being apart. It makes sense, maybe a bit too much sense now that I think about it. Gotta love the times when humans manage to surprise and delight me instead of confuse and horrify me like they typically do. And part of the binding contract I made with her during her force fed advice session is that I will keep hammering away on my little slice of forum blogginess for the rest of the month to see if my moods will improve which I put things back into their proper perspectives (minus the beer goggles).
(Afterthoughts)
The best place to hide something is in plain site so no wonder I didn't realize why I was getting so damn twitchy. And yes, I do still think posts like this suck ass and hate writing them and always wonder that if I only do them now and again because I am bored or if I let them slip in so that I have something to be pissed off about later on down the road when I look back.
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